Don’t Wait Until It’s Gone to Say "Thank You."

Fellas, let me talk to you straight.

One of the most dangerous traps for strong, seasoned men like us isn’t failure. It isn’t rejection. It isn’t even aging.

It’s comfort.

See, failure will sharpen you. Rejection will force you to dig deeper. Aging—even that—can make you wiser if you embrace it.

But comfort? Comfort is sneaky. It whispers, “You’ve made it. You can relax. Everyone and everything will always be here.”

And before you know it, you’re coasting. You stop showing up with fire. You stop pouring into the people and opportunities that made you who you are. You get used to having things good…and you stop fighting to make them great.

That’s how good men lose their edge.

The Slow Drift into “Autopilot”

Here’s the truth: most of us don’t fall into a rut overnight.

We drift.

You start skipping family dinners because “work is busy.” You stop saying thank you to the people who hold you down—your wife, your assistant, your brother—because you assume they already know how you feel. You show up to work later, leave earlier, and tell yourself you’ve “earned it.”

But the drift always has a cost. And the bill always comes due.

A Real-Life Example (From My Coaching Lens)

I once worked with a man—let’s call him Jonathan.

On the surface, Jonathan had it all together. A strong career with money flowing in, a respected role in his company, a wife who had carried him through the early grind, and two kids who looked up to him like a superhero. By most accounts, he was living the dream.

But Jonathan started coasting.

He stopped telling his wife how much her sacrifices mattered. He figured his kids would “just know” he loved them, even when he missed their basketball games. At work, he did just enough to get by—trusting his reputation would cover him.

Then it hit him—all at once.

His wife sat him down one evening and said, “I feel invisible in this marriage.”

His boss called him in and told him bluntly, “Your performance is slipping. If you don’t turn this around, we’ll have to make a change.”

Even his best friend checked him: “Man, you never pick up the phone anymore. You disappearing on us.”

In the span of weeks, Jonathan realized—he wasn’t losing everything. He was giving it away. He had been living on autopilot, taking for granted the very blessings men pray for.

Why This Hits So Hard

Jonathan’s story might sound extreme, but let’s be real: we’ve all been there in some form.

• We’ve all had moments where:

• We assumed a friend would “always be there” until one day, they weren’t.

• We figured our health would hold up until the doctor’s report said otherwise.

• We thought our job was secure until leadership changed, and suddenly, it wasn’t.

Life has a way of reminding us—nothing is guaranteed. And if you stop honoring what you have, you risk losing it.

The Shift That Saved Him

Jonathan didn’t let his story end in loss. He made a shift.

He committed to daily gratitude—not just in his head, but out loud. He told his wife what she meant to him. He showed up at his kids’ games with his phone off. At work, he started giving more than what was required, instead of skirting by.

It didn’t change overnight. But slowly, he rebuilt trust, rebuilt his edge, rebuilt his life.

That’s what gratitude does—it sharpens your vision. It reminds you of what’s truly valuable. It gives you the energy to protect and expand what matters most.

The Lesson for Us

Taking people and opportunities for granted is like running your car on fumes. You might roll down the road for a while, but sooner or later, you stall out.

And when you stall, the world doesn’t wait for you. It keeps moving.

So the question isn’t: “Do you have enough in your tank right now?”

The question is: “Are you refilling it every day?”

Because the man who refuels with gratitude, with presence, with effort—never runs dry.

Your Challenge Today

Here’s my challenge to you:

• Name 3 people you’ve been taking for granted. Call or text them today. Don’t wait. Tell them why they matter. Be specific.

• Pause at least twice today. Step away from the grind. Breathe. Ask yourself, “What am I grateful for right now?” Write it down.

• Replace expectation with appreciation. Instead of assuming your wife, your team, or your friends “should” show up for you, flip it: How can I show up better for them?

Brothers, listen. Comfort is a silent thief. Gratitude is the weapon that protects what you love.

Don’t let life teach you this lesson the hard way.

Your move.

For weekly tips and insights on improving your midlife experiences professionally and personally, listen to my weekly podcast, Midlife Revolution Unleashed, on your favorite podcast channel.